Archive | August 4, 2014

I’m Still here!!!

20140303_180741When I lost my only child, Aris, my whole life changed and NOT by me wanting it to. I have been through every emotion the human brain and body have to offer!!! But, I’m still here!!! Yes, I deal with missing her and loving her more, but I’M still here. I honor her spirit and who she was and NEVER forget. I don’t have the luxury of checking out completely or pretending that she’s just away somewhere. ┬áThose things aren’t real. The courage that I’ve shown through the pain many will never ever attain! Let alone understand. But I’ve never asked anyone to either, ever. What I have wanted but never asked is that people don’t personalize the situation because I’m the one living it. If it’s hard to talk to me or face me or feel weird around me, it’s you not me. This is a hard walk but I would never be a victim! I’m still here!!! My role is to show that life can be hard and filled with the most unimaginable things but, to never give up! Everything that happens to you, you were built for. You had everything you needed the whole time, but it had to be pulled from the depths of your soul! The person that comes out after is even more extraordinary! I was deeply effected by the death of my daughter, but being her mom was one part of the totality of the person I am. I can’t let her death or how others view me DEFINE who I am. I have the strength to live my life and the worst thing ever, out loud for everyone to see, and again, I’m still here!!!!